Drama and Discourse

I've moved!

2007-08-13T10:36:00.000-04:00

You can now find me here: http://notthemama.wordpress.com/

Please come on over and visit anytime!

It's official!

2007-08-12T22:08:00.000-04:00

Tonight Jamie and I signed the lease on a condo. We're moving in just over a month, and I can't wait! I love this condo so much, that I've been reluctant to talk about it for fear of jinxing it. I'm not usually superstitious, but I wasn't taking any chances.

Our new place is a big, open loft with the living area downstairs and our bedroom/bathroom upstairs. There is a spiral staircase that leads upstairs, where the bedroom is open and has a wrought iron railing. The loft only covers the kitchen/dining area, so the living room has vaulted ceilings and the far wall has floor-to-ceiling windows with a sliding glass door that leads to the balcony/terrace, which overlooks a park. It's located in a country club with gated security (and a 24-hour doorman/gatekeeper), golf course, restaurant, fitness center, tennis courts, and three pools.

After living in our little basement apartment for eight months, it feels like paradise.

Where's Winston?

2007-08-11T10:46:00.000-04:00

If the strep throat doesn't kill her....

2007-08-10T18:09:00.000-04:00

...I might.

Henry's first sign

2007-08-09T19:34:00.000-04:00

I have been signing to Henry (using ASL) since he was born. And just this week, he's started signing back. So far his only word is "milk" and he's only using it sporadically. But I still find it pretty thrilling.

The video is blurry, but if you watch his right hand, you'll see him open and close his fist repeatedly. That's the sign for milk.

Cue the theme to The Twilight Zone

2007-08-09T09:11:00.000-04:00

I'm about to let you in on a not-so-well-kept secret: I love to be scared. I love horror movies. I love telling ghost stories. I love reading suspenseful books late into the night with just a reading lamp for light and then freaking out when the house creaks.

So last night after dinner, Jamie and I settled in with our latest rental. The movie was a little slow, but toward the end, the suspense began to build. The main character slowly and deliberately climbed the steps to the water tower as the music swelled behind her. We were on the edge of our seats when BAM! We both jumped about a foot in the air, and I'm pretty sure one of us screamed. It sounded like a bomb went off in our front yard, and we weren't far off. Turns out we weren't the only ones driven by the record-high temperatures to hole up in our homes cranking the AC. The stress on the power lines caused the transformer across the street to blow.

The explosion turned out to be the least of our problems when we discovered we'd be without power for three hours. The sun was already down, so we didn't die of heat stroke. However, we very nearly died of boredom.

I won't bore you with the details of our boring night. But I will get back to the scary/creepy stories part of this entry.

About a week after I moved to Atlanta last December, while I was virtually homeless thanks to the "perfect" roommate who turned out to be less than perfect, (She turned out to be a psycho liar, if you want to get technical.) I was crashing at Jamie's while I frantically searched for a new apartment. And one morning I woke up to discover that I had lost my driver's license and debit card. I had the cards the night before, and when I woke up they were gone. I searched and searched and searched. I tore about my car, my meager belongings, and Jamie's house. Finally, I gave up, convinced that they were gone forever. I thought maybe I had left them on top of the car and driven off or that maybe someone had stolen them. This led to the drama getting the debit card canceled and replaced. And I had to have the NC DMV send my replacement license to Georgia. Of course this all took twice as long as it should have, given the fact that I lost them three days before Christmas.

So yesterday I was in the bathroom, and I pulled out my travel bag...and there they were, sitting in the front flap. I don't know how I overlooked it back then, since I know I emptied out that bag repeatedly. And I don't know how I've missed it in the interceding months, since I've used that bag at least five or six times in the last eight months. I have no explanation, other than to say that I am blind or crazy. I'm sure the cards must have been there the whole time, I just don't know how I missed them.

Of course, the only other explanation is that they were borrowed by an underaged ghost who needed access to a hot otherworld club.

Right after I found my long-lost cards, I logged on and found that one of my new favorite bloggers had just posted a similar (but far more interesting!) story of items lost and found. Check out her blog and her ghost story.

Melting

2007-08-07T12:37:00.001-04:00

Today we left the house for a quick errand at 9:30am. The thermometer on the porch was already at 82. When we got back an hour later, it was at 96.

A few minutes ago, I went outside to grab a forgotten toy out of the car and I thought my face was going to melt off my body. Also, possibly, my hair was singed by the strength of the sun's rays.

I need to find some baby-friendly indoor activities around here besides browsing at Barnes and Noble. Outdoor activities like the park are not an option for obvious reasons, and I'm tired of flipping through magazines and reading the backs of books I have no intention of buying or reading.

Meanwhile, sitting home playing with the same toys and reading the same board books day after day is melting my brain. And I'm not the only one.

Henry is on strike and refuses to play with any of his toys. He is only interested in my cell phone and my computer. I think he is trying to contact the outside world to ask them to send in backup. I can't say I blame him.

More than meets the eye

2007-08-07T06:10:00.001-04:00

Jamie and I went to see Transformers this weekend....twice. Please excuse my dorkiness for a moment when I say: BEST MOVIE EVER.

Okay, seriously, I loved this movie. I know part of it is the nostalgia factor. I played with Transformers growing up and occasionally watched the cartoon. But the other part of it is that the movie was really, really good.

While the epic battle of good and evil and the seriously amazing special effects still appealed to the child in me, it definitely wasn't a kids movie (the PG-13 rating should be your first clue). The humor was on point and would have gone over the heads of most children. (The scene where Sam's mother grills him about whether or not he was masturbating "Sam's happy time!" was hilarious.) The acting was fantastic -- especially Shia LaBeouf. And the special effects were so good that the autobots and decepticons didn't look computer generated at all.

It was definitely the best movie I've seen in a long time. I can't wait for the next movie in the trilogy.

pensive

2007-08-06T12:22:00.001-04:00

You catch more flies with honey....

2007-08-03T17:26:00.001-04:00

Dear Snotty Girl at the Cactus Car Wash,

Yes, I know my car was dirty. Really, really dirty. After all, that is why I was at the car wash. What would be the point of taking a clean car to the car wash? However, it was not caked in mud nor was there anything growing in the backseat. Therefore, I think it was a little unnecessary, the way you wrinkled your nose when you approached my vehicle. Also, I am unclear as to why you rolled your eyes when I asked for the standard car wash. I tried to ask if something was wrong, but you abruptly walked away.

When you came back, you asked me if I had ever had the car waxed. I'm sure you were trying to be helpful, but I almost couldn't understand you as you choked on your disgust. I was so taken aback that I couldn't form a coherent reply. I'm guessing from your patronizing, "You know, if you wax it occasionally, it might actually look like the color it's supposed to be." that you must have taken that my silence for a "no".

I was a little embarrassed and very angry. I wanted very much to turn around and leave (even though I had no idea how to do so logistically, given that the driveway is one way, and I was, by all appearances, trapped). However, what you didn't know is that I was having the car cleaned as a surprise for my girlfriend. She's been complaining about how dirty it is for awhile now and I know it's really bugging her. Also, we were supposed to leave in a half hour to get a friend of hers from the airport, so I didn't exactly have time to take it elsewhere or do it myself.

Before your approach, I was feeling really good. In fact, I was brimming over with pride, just imagining Jamie's face when she came home and saw the car glistening in the driveway. Thanks for taking that away and putting me in my place. Wouldn't want to get a big head or anything.

The car looks nice and clean now, and I'm really happy with it. I think you might be right though. It could use a little extra something, and I think I'll get it waxed next time I take it to be washed. Don't worry though, I'll be sure to take it somewhere else. I wouldn't want to ruin your day again by showing up at your car wash with my dirty car.

Sincerely,
Annie

Summer Days

2007-08-02T21:20:00.001-04:00

It's been a long week. Back-to-back overnights wear me down. I miss Jamie, I miss my puppy, and I miss sleeping in my own bed. But it's hard to complain about sunny summer mornings spent at the park with a baby who has just recently discovered the joy of swinging.

Ahoy Mateys!

2007-08-01T15:05:00.001-04:00

My latest completed knitting project is a sweater for Henry. Hopefully he'll be able to wear it at the tail end of this winter, but more likely we'll have to wait until next winter.

The pattern is from Zoe Mellor's book Adorable Knits for Tots, and it's called "ship ahoy! sweater". I chose a different shade of blue for the main color, simply because I already had a bunch of the light blue sitting around begging for a purpose.

The directions were easy to follow assuming you actually pay attention -- otherwise you wind up ripping half of it out because you didn't realize you were supposed to be shaping the armholes at the same time you were working on the pattern. Not that I know anything about that... I loved the picture in the book, and I'm quite pleased with how it turned out. My only complaint is that the sizing was very broad. I would have really liked to make it in a 12-18 months size, since Henry turns one in November. Unfortunately, my choices were 6-12 months or 1-2 years. It looks like it is closer to two years than one, so he probably won't get much wear out of it this winter. Still, that's a pretty minor complaint, and overall, I'm really happy with it. There are tons of other cute patterns in this book. I've made one other and I can't wait to make a few more.

Meet Henry

2007-08-01T11:48:00.000-04:00

When I last posted, the little prince had yet to be born. And now he's already on the verge of crawling. He's the sweetest, most easy-going baby in the world. (Knock on wood -- watch him do his worst to prove me wrong tonight!) Yes, he has his moments, but they are few and far between. And I'm not just saying that, I swear. Generally, he is just happy to be alive and finds fun and adventure in everything. Despite a little stranger anxiety, he loves people, and often charms passersby with his infectious grin.

He wants so badly to be crawling, and it's so funny to watch him scoot all over the room on his tummy or get up on his hands and knees and rock and rock and rock and rock...only to collapse in a heap.

Jamie is utterly in love with him. Which is funny since she's not much of a baby person. She went with me to see him for the first time, and was too scared to even touch or hold him. But after eight months of exposure, all that nervousness has worn off. She reaches for him the second she walks in the door -- and he reaches for her too. The other night she got him ready for bed all by herself. She bathed him, massaged him, diapered him, dressed him, etc. I didn't do anything but offer encouragement. It was one of the sweetest things I've ever seen. I know kids of our own are a long ways off for us, but seeing her with Henry makes me eager for those days.

Starting Over

2007-08-01T11:44:00.000-04:00

I can't believe it's been nearly a year since I last posted. Things got so busy with my move and my personal life that I just abandoned the blog. But I've missed it and I've decided to start it up again. This time, I'm going to broaded my topics to include my whole life, rather than just my writing. If/When I get back to seriously working on my novel (which still exists, but it waiting for a major overhaul as I've decided to make a major POV change in the narration), I'll post about that. But I'll also post more about my personal life, my professional life, etc.

Updated query

2006-10-03T16:41:00.000-04:00

When Amy Williams finds herself unemployed, thanks to a surprising loss on Election Day, she realizes that she is ready for a change. Sick of political debate and gridlock, she impulsively accepts a position teaching high school English in an Atlanta suburb.

Brett Gallagher is young, brash and idealistic. Just out of a two-year stint working with Teach for America, she dreams of making the world (or at least the public school system) a more welcoming place for gay teens. She is charming and outgoing, but seemingly incapable of an actual relationship, preferring instead one night stands and casual flings.

Brett and Amy meet at an orientation for new teachers, and there is an immediate attraction. They spend the summer getting to know each other and falling in love despite their differences. By early fall, the two women are enjoying the bliss of a new relationship. But all of that changes when a gay student is harassed and the offender is given a slap on the wrist.

The event brings to a head their contrasting views on life and politics. Brett risks her job by leading an unpopular crusade to convince the conservative school board to amend the student handbook. Despite parental outcry, she argues that they need to include sexual orientation as a protected group alongside race and religion. But Amy, who is uncomfortable in the limelight and fears drawing attention to their personal relationship, wants to work more subtly to teach her students about tolerance and diversity. This dichotomy places a great deal of strain on their fledgling relationship, and each must decide how much she is willing to compromise.

Complete at 85,000 words, Learning Curves is a love story about two women who seek the same goals, but follow different paths. Though the story stands on its own, I am currently working on a second novel starring some of the supporting characters. If you would like to read more about Brett and Amy, a full manuscript is available upon request.

Overwhelmed

2006-10-03T16:37:00.000-04:00

Wow, I forgot how much work it was to be a full-time student and work as well. I'm so inundated with reading assignments, papers, studying, etc., that most of the time I can't even contemplate writing. Add to that the stress of preparing for a move and finding a new roommate and all thoughts of writing go straight out the window.

I've got a little time off this week from work, so hopefully I'll get in some good writing time. But I'm not holding my breath. The good news is that I did some really detailed brainstorming while Page was in town this weekend and really hammered down some specifics that have been eluding me. I also outlined the second book, which is exciting (but also seems crazy since I still haven't finished this one).

I did find a little time to tweak my query, so check that out.

excuses

2006-09-21T00:46:00.000-04:00

Yesterday was a wash, because Tuesday is my looong day. I'm either working or in class from 8am until 8pm. By the time I get home, I'm starving and exhausted, so yesterday I did what I normal do on Tuesdays -- vegged in front of the TV and pretended to do homework/study.

Today was a lot of fun. Page was in town visiting. We went to Spotted Dog and I got to meet Nancy. The cute waitress who I think has a crush on me was not our waitress. (Probably a good thing since Page would have done something to embarrass me, I'm sure.) Instead it was this sketchy old hippie woman who is incredibly awkward. Nice, but awkward. Afterward we came back here and Winston modeled his Halloween costumes. (Yes, that's plural. I couldn't decide, so I bought two.) Nancy thinks I should make a calendar of Winston in various outfits and sell it online.

Then I watched America's Next Top Model season premiere because I am a slave to pop culture. So far I only hate about 3/4 of the contestants, so we're off to a good start.

In between all this intellectual stimulation, I managed to edit my last chapter and get started on Chapter 19. I didn't get a whole lot done, but it's something.

current word count: 53,435

priorities

2006-09-18T23:52:00.000-04:00

Major progress tonight. I finished another chapter and I'm rearing to go for the next one. Unfortunately, this progress comes at the expense of schoolwork. But hey, a girl has to prioritize right?

It feels great to be back in the story again. I was really adrift for awhile, but I think I'm on course again. The next chapter is pretty important for setting up the major conflict, so I hope I can do it well.

current word count: 52,843

Back on track?

2006-09-18T00:49:00.000-04:00

After weeks of just cutting and editing, I finally did some new writing. I wrote about 1600 words today. It was hard, but it felt good. Hopefully I can get back into the habit of writing every day. I'm making a big shift -- the courting phase of the novel is over. Now it's all about the conflict and compromise. It only gets tougher from here on out, but I'm really excited about this part of the novel, so hopefully that will keep me motivated.

current word count: 50,820

My Story

2006-09-11T16:03:00.000-04:00

We all have a story from that day. I wasn't planning to write about mine, but someone asked me earlier about my experience, and I told them. I thought that since I took the time to write it all down, I might as well post it here as well. So here's my story:

Five years ago, I had just moved from Washingon, D.C. to NC to return to school. I was miserable and homesick. I missed my friend and the city I considered home. I thought daily about quitting school and returning to my life there.

At the time, I was sharing an apartment with another student who had just moved to town from D.C. Normally, I watch CNN while I get ready in the morning. But that morning, I woke up late and rushed straight into the shower. When I came out, I heard Tim's girlfriend (who was still living and working in DC) leaving a message on the answering machine. She was on her cell phone and in a panic. They had been evacuated from their office building, as had all government employees. She was sobbing and telling us that everyone was panicked and no one knew what was going on, only that there were bombs or explosions or something, and that we were under attack. Tim came out of his room at the same time I emerged from the bathroom, so we both sort of stood there in the hall in shock listening to her talk. In the background we could hear the utter panic of the mass of people being evacuated, and it was terrifying. He lunged for the phone, and I lunged for the remote. We turned on CNN just in time to see the replay of the plane hitting the Pentagon and were utterly shocked.

I skipped all my classes that day and spent all day glued to the television and getting error messages as I tried to call my friends. Having lived in D.C., I was far more concerned (in that moment) with what had happened at the Pentagon and with the plane that was still in the air and said to be headed for the White House, than I was with what was happening in NYC. All of my friends at that time lived in D.C. and were working either on Capital Hill or in the Pentagon. Those who didn't work at the Pentagon took the metro THROUGH the Pentagon every morning right around the time of the attack. (Just as I had been doing up until I moved away to go back to school.) I had no idea if anyone I know was killed/injured in the Pentagon attack or whether there would be more attacks on D.C. Jerimie had just recently enlisted in the Navy and was stationed at the time in Maryland and sent to D.C. for crisis control. So my family was in a panic, worried that he would be injured in another attack, or that we would immediately declare war and he would be deployed. I spent a lot of time trying to calm them. Meanwhile, I was terrified, angry and feeling a lot of what I guess was mild survivors guilt -- I should have BEEN there. I WANTED to be there. I was homesick and hating NC and had been questioning daily my decision to move away from D.C. And when this happened, I felt so helpless being so far away. I wanted to be with my friends and family, not two states away unable to even get them on the phone thanks to overloaded circuits.

After the D.C. panic calmed down and it became clear that the damage and death toll there was going to be very minor compared to NYC, my focus shifted. But that was a much more removed feeling of sadness for me. I was obviously upset by it, but not in the personal way that I viewed the D.C. attack. A good friends' father is a NYC police officer stationed near the WTC. He was unaccounted for for two days while he worked at the site, unable to get a message to his family that he was all right. I spent a lot of time trying to comfort his daughter. And I had a number of other friends with family members who were missing or unaccounted for. Luckily, everyone I knew was eventually found and was safe.

I know how incredibly lucky I am that I wasn't there that day and that no one I know was killed or seriously injured. But it was one of the most personally terrifying experiences of my life ,and I don't like reliving it, which is why I hadn't planned to post anything about it today. I understand that everyone grieves/remembers differently, and for some all this five-year hype is cathartic. But for me, walking across campus today and seeing the flags and tributes and hearing the speakers made me feel ill. I'm steadfastly avoiding the television. I do think it's important that we remember what happened that day and honor those we lost. We don't want to forget about it. But I'm in no danger of forgetting, and I don't relish reliving it over and over again.

I'm not sure why all of this attention bothers me so much. I talk about 9/11 in passing on any other day without getting upset. But for some reason today it's really bothering me. I think a lot of it was knowing that CNN was rerunning the live coverage from that day and the idea of watching it like I did then -- glued to the tv for hours and hours on end -- brought me back in a way that just talking about it has not. It's one thing to talk about my experience or remember it briefly, but I definitely don't want to sit and watch the live coverage replayed from that day.

Behind the times

2006-09-03T00:19:00.000-04:00

I was in high school when Ellen Degeneres' sitcom was on television. Shockingly, it was one of my favorite things to watch. (In retrospect, this is yet one more glaring signs my parents missed. I always think about that scene in But I'm a Cheerleader when Megan's family confronts her about her kd Lang posters and vegetarianism. If my family had just been a tiny bit more savvy, I'm sure there would have been an intervention where they confronted me with my love of Ellen and softball.) Anyway, I remember thinking the show was hilarious and making an effort to watch it every week. And for the first few seasons, my whole family watched and enjoyed it.

And then...we all know what happened. Rumors started circling that not only was Ellen gay in real life, but that she was going to out herself on the show. There was outrage and a whole lot of name-calling in my house (the oh-so witty "Ellen Degenerate was -- and remains -- a family favorite). And, of course, I was forbidden to watch the show from then on out.

So I never saw the infamous "puppy episode".

Thankfully, the Oxygen network has been rerunning the series in its entirety. And Thursday and Friday, they aired the two-part episode. So, only a decade after the rest of the world, I finally saw Ellen Morgan come out to her friends.

I was just a few months shy of my seventeenth birthday when this aired the originally. And by that time, let me tell you, I had already been struggling with my sexuality for years. I knew what I was feeling "wasn't normal" and seeing how my family reacted to a perfect stranger's coming out, reaffirmed to me that it was not something I should discuss or contemplate personally. So I stuffed those feelings down deep inside and didn't deal with them until years later when I was in college and out from under the thumb of my family and our oppressive community.

So I watched this episode on two levels: On one, it was pure fun. The dialogue and situational irony was snappy and amusing as always. I laughed, I cringed, I rolled my eyes. It was a very enjoyable hour, and I'm glad I finally got a chance to watch it. On the other hand, I watched it imagining what it would have been like to see this as a teenager. And on that level, it was bittersweet. Because I can only imagine how much it would have helped. I can only imagine how wonderful it would have felt to know I wasn't alone and that I wasn't evil or sick for feeling the way I did. If only I hadn't been "sheltered" from this, my journey might have been that much easier. I hope there were others out there in my position who didn't have to wait a decade to see this. So, to Ellen, I say: "Thank you. And I'm sorry it took me ten years to say it."

Hurricane Party

2006-08-31T19:19:00.000-04:00

We're battening down the hatches here, preparing for Tropical Storm Ernesto. Dozens of schools are already announcing cancelations and delays for tomorrow. Right now it's dreary, but not particularly ominous. I may or may not leave the house tomorrow. (I'm leaning toward not -- four day weekend!)

Meanwhile, I'm baking a cake and I stocked up on movies. I'm really excited about Unveiled.

And of course, I'll be using the time to write. I need to edit first. I made some progress over the last two weeks (despite all the insanity that has been going on here). I'm caught up to the scene that I jumped ahead and wrote a few weeks back. But the last three chapters need some heavy editing to fix the flow.

And Winston would like y'all to know that he reads your comments, and yes, he is also an aspiring novelist....

Jarron Ennis said...

Cute pooch! And yeah, I just can't see how you get any writing done. Looks like the Poochmeister is trying to write his own novel....

current word count: 49,721

negative progress

2006-08-20T02:04:00.000-04:00

Yes, the current word count is correct. But the good news is three-fold:

1) The cuts were REALLY necessary and I'm much happier with the beginning of the story. There was way too much filler and description, and now we get to the action much faster.

2) I actually cut around 3500 words. So while there was a net loss, I did manage to get farther in the story. I wrote around 700 words tonight after the glut of editing. I'm well on my way in the next chapter, and I'm hoping that tomorrow will be a very productive day.

3) I got some REALLY nice comments in the critiques I got back today. Along with the incredibly helpful constructive criticism that led to the gutting of the first two chapters, there were some fantastically complimentary comments. That definitely gave me something to hang on to when I was scrapping large swaths of writing.

current word count: 41,701

thursday already?

2006-08-18T02:19:00.000-04:00

I finally finished chapter sixteen, which was killing me. I don't know why it was so hard. It wasn't a critical chapter, but it was like pulling teeth to get it finished. I let it sit for a few hours and went back over it, and it's actually better than I thought. (Which isn't saying much.) So at least I can be thankful it is finished. I'm looking forward to moving on, though I admit to being a little nervous that the next chapter will be just as hard.

In the meantime, I've sent the first two chapters off to be critiqued. I'm nervous but very excited to see what kind of feedback I get.

Lizzie and I have a new joint venture that I'm excited about as well. Now's definitely not the best time for me to be taking on a new project, but it's too perfect to pass up.

current word count: 43,442

overdue

2006-08-16T01:22:00.000-04:00

It's been far too long since I updated, which is really indicative of the fact that it's been far too long since I made any substantial progress. The last week has been crazy. Among other stresses, I finished my last week at work and gained a roommate.

The good news is, I now have one week until my classes start and ten days until I start my new job. That's lots of time for writing! I need to buckle down and get back on track.

current word count: 42,607

quote of the day

2006-08-11T00:33:00.000-04:00

lizzlecc: apparently I have made out with someone who performed at Lilith Fair. Of the two of us, I was pretty sure you were going to reach that mark first

meh

2006-08-11T00:32:00.000-04:00

The past two days have been a total bust. I've been overwhelmed with real life stress and utterly unmotivated to write. I managed to eek out a couple of pages tonight, but not enough to count for much. I need to do another big push this weekend, but writing is a secondary priority since I have to prepare for the arrival of my new roommate on Sunday.

current word count: 41,250

caught up

2006-08-08T23:51:00.000-04:00

Chapter two is complete and added into the main manuscript. I managed to get across a lot of introductory information that really had no home before, which is exciting. Hopefully the chapter doesn't read like one giant exposition. I did some general cleaning up of some earlier chapters as well. No forward progress, but there's only so much you can do in one night. And I still don't really know what's going to happen in the next chapter. Maybe the inspiration will come to me in a dream tonight. One can hope.

current word count: 40,893

take two

2006-08-08T13:52:00.000-04:00

Common consensus seems to be that I'm doing a disservice to the prologue by labeling it as such since many editors/readers dislike prologues. The fear seems to be that many people will skip or skim it because they will think it's unimportant.

My argument has always been that it needs to be a prologue partially because it is set a few months before the rest of the narrative, but moreso because the POV shifts in each chapter and Chapter 1 is also from Amy's POV. I had toyed with an intermediate chapter from Brett's POV but couldn't think of what should go in that chapter and didn't want to waste space.

The good news is, I had a brainstorm today for that section. I realized that the prologue is only 1700 words, roughly half of my other chapters. If I write another chapter of that legnth, I can have the first two chapters be shorter, introductory chapters so that the reader can get to know each character individually. Then once they meet, the chapters can be longer.

I'm actually thrilled, because now that I'm half way through the story, I can think of lots of things that belong in Brett's introductory chapter. So my job for today is to write what will now be Chapter 2.

lucky thirteen

2006-08-08T00:22:00.000-04:00

Thirteen chapters down! I would have liked to write a bit more tonight, but I have no idea where I'm going next, and I think I need to sleep on it. I have a short list of possibilities for the next two chapters, I just need to figure out how to organize those scenes. I made decent progress tonight. I think my big press this weekend really got my on the right track again.

current word count: 39,428

Distractions, part 2

2006-08-07T11:41:00.000-04:00

Who can write when a sweet baby wants to play dress up?

Thirteen pounds of love and smiles. Happy 4-month birthday, Lauren.

Distractions

2006-08-06T22:50:00.000-04:00

It's amazing I get anything written with these work conditions....

Victory!

2006-08-06T22:30:00.000-04:00

It was a hard push, but I did it!

In just over 48 hours, I cranked out 7,005 words. If only I could keep up that pace, I'd be done in ten days! (That sound you hear is hysterical laughter as I contemplate the possibility of maintaining this pace.)

I had plenty of momentum at the beginning, but the last 1000 words was like pulling teeth. I couldn't give up once I was that close though.

Also this weekend, my prologue was up on crapometer and I got lots of great feedback and advice. I made a bunch of tiny edits and now I feel like the prologue is finally on par with the rest of the story, which is a great feeling. It's nerve wrecking enough to feel like you have a giant weak spot, but it's even worse when that weak spot is the first thing that people (ie editors) read.

current word count: 37,555 (!!)

progress report

2006-08-05T22:01:00.000-04:00

Halfway through the weekend, and I'm halfway to my goal. I'm at 34,292 words and taking a short break while I figure out where I'm going next. I hope to get in a little more writing tonight and then the pressure is on for tomorrow.

In the meantime, I'm indulging myself with teeny-bopper romantic comedies (Legally Blonde and 10 Things I Hate About You) and cuddling with my sad, neglected little dog.

In other news, I have a cute new neighbor and she baked me cookies. Can't argue with that. :)

**bedtime update (2:30am)**

current word count: 35,210

goals are a good thing

2006-08-04T19:43:00.000-04:00

After my glut of progress yesterday, today has been slow. I spent all morning/afternoon at the mall. And so far this evening all I've done is a little brainstorming.

There's no reason I can't make major progress this week. I have no plans and it's far too hot to contemplate any outdoor activity. So I'm setting an ambitious goal for myself: halfway point by Sunday at bedtime. Half of my estimated 75K words is 37,500. So I need to write approximately 7,000 words in 53 hours.

Let the games begin...

one-track mind

2006-08-03T23:57:00.000-04:00

I spent ALL DAY today writing and editing. Lauren was kind enough to take a long morning nap, and I only had to work a half-day, so I was home by 1pm. I wrote almost an entire chapter today, I just need to add one more conversation. Unfortunately, I jumped ahead and wrote Chapter 17 in a separate file to be added when I get to that point. So it doesn't look like I made much progress.

Chapter 17 is at 2756 words. A chunk of that (approx. 750 words) was ripped from the earlier story I mentioned in yesterday's post. It required some really heavy-duty editing, but I'm thrilled that I got to use a couple of descriptions and lines. It was definitely worth salvaging.

I'm not going to add this chapter to my current word count right now. I'll add it when I get there chronologically.

current word count: 30,550

progress!

2006-08-02T23:40:00.000-04:00

Excellent update today:

I finished Chapter 10 -- a major accomplishment since that final scene was giving me fits.

I'm already over the 1000 word quota and I think I can squeeze out a few more paragraphs before bed.

And I got the nicest email today from someone who had read one of my old, old short stories that is apparently still posted online. I had forgotten all about the story and the feedback inspired me to go reread it. Upon reading it, I realized that there is a scene or two in there that is PERFECT for this novel. With just a little adapting and editing, I think I can find a home for some of those scenes. Which is exciting not only because it helps this story, but also because I really, really loved that story but had no idea what to do with it. I'm glad that part of it will find its way into something bigger and better.

current word count: 30,397

Slow but steady

2006-08-02T00:03:00.000-04:00

Progress is slow going. Once again, I didn't hit the 1000-word quota today. I wrote about half of that, but I also did a bunch of little edits through the text. I need to stop fiddling with it and just push forward. I can revise later.

On the home front: I had another job interview today. Why is it that whatever interview Ive had most recently is the job I want? I've now got two preliminary offers and probably one more coming later this week. So at least I'm not stressed about finding a job anymore. Now I just have to decide which to take or how to arrange it so I can arrange my schedule to take more than one. I'll be so glad when all of this is settled. It will be nice to have the piece of mind, and it will be nice to come straight home from work and not have to rush off to job interviews.

current word count: 29,379

The times, they are a-changin'

2006-08-01T00:36:00.000-04:00

Well, not so much the times as my story, I suppose.

I did some MAJOR brainstorming for the sequel today, which required some backtracking and rewriting of this story. Melissa's name has been changed to Campbell and she's now much older and a lawyer. Her relationship with Jodie has changed too, there's still the unrequited love, but now they have a history.

And the story's new working title -- suggested by one of EE's minions -- is Learning Curves. I think that works on a lot of levels, as Brett and Amy, who are both teachers, are learning now to make a relationship work.

Speaking of the minions, tons of feedback on my query letter. Check it out.

current word count: 28,804

Thanks, EE!

2006-07-31T13:51:00.000-04:00

Evil Editor reviewed my query on his blog today. Any of you who are unfamiliar with his site should spend some time digging through the archives. He dispenses great advice about the publishing world mixed with humor at the expense of those of us blindly feeling our way into said world.

I was really pleased that my query only required "some shortening and polishing". I struggled with it a lot and was not very happy with what I sent him, but didn't know how to make it any better.

His comments made me laugh and I got some invaluable help. Can't knock that.

for the record: you can tell this is an old version that I sent him because the main character's name is still Allison. It has since been changed to Amy. But then, y'all know that already. Right?

Adult ADD

2006-07-31T00:01:00.000-04:00

Not to make light of a serious disorder, but I seriously need to learn how to focus. I spent all weekend flitting from one project to another. I hammered out salary negotions for my Atlanta job (victoriously, I might add -- yay for a substantial raise), sat through a two-hour interview for a job that starts in two weeks and will get me through the end of the year, and sent out dozens of emails about jobs.

When I wasn't worrying about my job situation, I meandered around the house doing a whole lot of nothing. I did far less writing than I should have, but I did hit my 1000-word quota each day, so I can't complain too much. I also read a book and spent some quality time with the beast. And I watched a bunch of episodes of Mythbusters, which is a recent obsession.

Amazingly, as I was writing the World of Coke scene, I ran across a Travel Channel special that profiled it. Talk about good timing.

Current word count: 28,307

TGIF

2006-07-28T22:20:00.000-04:00

Well, this week has been a wash. I've been so embroiled in my search for a job for the fall semester that I just haven't had the energy to do much writing. I did write around 1500 words on Thursday, so that's something. A long session at Caribou is in the plans for tomorrow. Next up: World of Coke!

Current word count: 25,642

Words of Encouragement

2006-07-26T19:56:00.000-04:00

I just received this follow-up email from my beta reader.

I didn't see any problem with the pacing or the characters at all. It was a very pleasant read, which tells me that what you're doing is just fine. I think the areas I already commented on are about it from my POV. Of course, a professional editor might have other things to say, but I think if you tighten things up, as discussed, you'll have a good shot when submitting. I most enjoyed the way you presented that early attraction / tension between the two characters and your plan for the rest of the book sounds pretty good, too. I think you did that well and, in general, your writing is very good. I've beta read for a stack of people that haven't published yet and there has been a wide variety of skills. I'd put yours up there at the top. So keep writing!

It made my day and (hopefully) has inspired me to get back on track with my daily writing. All my edits are made now, so I have no more excuses. One thousands words per day minimum. I better get cracking if I'm going to make my quote for the day.

Weekend update

2006-07-24T08:33:00.000-04:00

Are there really people who live happy lives without internet? Is it completely pathetic that I can't imagine that?

My internet was out at home this weekend, and I nearly went insane being unable to check my email. Thank goodness for free internet at Panera. (And free food at Panera also, thanks to knowing the girl working at the counter!)

I got my first round of edits back from my beta reader yesterday and spent all evening making edits. I think everything is a lot tighter now and I'm much happier with a few spots. I did some major reorganizing/rewriting of the prologue as well, which is fantastic because I've been really worried about that but couldn't figure out exactly what was the problem. So it was a productive weekend even though I didn't add much to the word count.

Right now I'm working on a scene with Julia and I'm not really sure where I'm going with it. Hopefully I'll get a sudden flash of inspiration. Lately I feel like I'm doing more deleting than writing. And while I don't regret anything I've cut, I'd like to start seeing some net gains.

current word count: 24,468

Warning: Delay Ahead

2006-07-20T14:28:00.000-04:00

I swore I wasn't going to buy it until it came out in paperback. But I couldn't resist temptation any longer. And once I start it, I probably won't be able to do anything remotely productive until I'm finished.

In the meantime, if you have any ideas for cute, fun dates in Atlanta let me know. (BESIDES World of Coke -- you've worn me down. I promise to include it!)

Introductions, pt. 2: The Story

2006-07-19T13:24:00.000-04:00

Background:

The novel, with the working title Common Ground, is a lesbian romance/fiction novel that will probably come in right around 75,000 words. I officially started writing the last week in June, but the characters and bits of the plot have been floating around in my imagination for much longer. Right now I seem to be averaging roughly 1000-2000 words per day, and I'd like to maintain that average. I'll be posting a word count at the end of each day, along with any thoughts on my progress.

Current word count: 24,391

Summary:

Common Ground is a love story between two women who seek the same goals, but follow very different paths.

An unexpected loss on Capitol Hill leaves Amy Williams scrambling to find a new career path, and in a departure from her usual thoughtful behavior, she impulsively accepts a position teaching high school English. She is not sure how her shy persona will translate to the classroom -- or how her mature, reserved nature will adjust to Atlanta, the lesbian Mecca of the Southeast.

Brett Gallagher is young, brash and idealistic. Just out of a two-year stint working with Teach for America, she dreams of making the world (or at least the public school system) a more welcoming place for gay teens. She is charming and magnetic but seemingly incapable of an actual relationship, preferring instead one night stands and casual flings.

When the two women meet at an orientation for new teachers, sparks fly immediately, and the two women spend the summer getting to know each other better and falling in love. It is a difficult road because along with their political and personality differences, the constant parade of Brett’s ex-lovers makes Amy jealous and insecure. She fears that even if Brett is genuine about her feelings, it won't take long for her to lose interest.

By early fall, the two women are enjoying the bliss of a new relationship. But all of that changes when there is an incident of homophobia at the high school where they teach.

The event brings to a head their contrasting views on life and politics, including how out they need to be at work. While Brett risks her job to lead an unpopular crusade to have sexual orientation and gender identity listed as a protected group in the school's student handbook, Amy would prefer to avoid what she sees as a losing battle and instead work more subtly to teach students about tolerance and diversity. This dichotomy places a great deal of strain on their fledgling relationship, and both have to decide which compromises are worth making and how far they will go to reach common ground.

Introductions, pt. 1: The blogger

2006-07-19T12:57:00.000-04:00

I am a would-be writer who spends most of my days brainstorming and most of my evenings pleading with my dog to behave long enough so that I can turn those ideas into a story. When I'm not writing (which is far more often than it should be) I'm usually found yelling at CNN, reading, or dressing my dog up in silly outfits. (He loves it, I swear!) My day job involves the care and keeping of the world's sweetest three-month-old baby girl.

This blog is meant to keep me honest about my writing -- to track how much progress I make each day and to keep me motivated. But I'm sure other aspects of my life will creep in, so don't be surprised to find a political diatribe or random musing mixed with the talk of writing.